photo love

I'm plugging away at a chapter that absolutely must be done by next week, so I won't be writing an update today. Still, I thought I might post a few photos as a way of sharing some of the wonderful things that have filled this year and kept me away from Blogger.

hiking along the Scottish coast...

and discovering WW II bunkers...




and old ruins...




and getting lost...



and coming home to sweet home Chicago...




and spending a day at one of the best places on Earth...
(and seeing the Cubbies win!!!)




and spending time with family...




and getting lost... again...




and indulging in classic Americana...




and Jane Austen...




and barbecues...




and table tennis...




and music...




and laughter...




and love...

Ummm, hello 2009?

So, I haven't posted anything in 2009. So much for daily blogging. I would like to promise that I will be posting every day from this point forward, but realistically I know that probably won't be happening in the immediate future. (Though it remains a steadfast goal.) There are good reasons for all this though: travels and adventures and that oh so pesky dissertation I am trying to submit by the end of the year. Good reasons indeed.

But reasons (excuses) aside, I will be back... and soon!

much love

a christmas wish

It is Christmas evening in Manchester and I have spent the day in a decidedly un-magical way: working on class preparations for the New Migrations course I will be teaching in January. This is the first time in my life that I have not celebrated Christmas day. Now, I will be celebrating with my mum in January, but it isn't quite the same. I have to say that I hope this is the last Christmas I spend alone or working. Next year I suspect that it will be an all out, gingerbread house, paper snowflakes, homemade nativity, stuffed pheasant day.

Anyway, as I am alone with Sarah's cats and have reached my UK immigration law reading saturation point, I have decided to put on a Chanel 4 special on the nativity. I've just finished watching a segment about the virgin birth debating whether Mary was in fact a virgin or if she was rape victim. There is historical evidence suggesting the latter.

A Christian anthropologist has just finished speaking. Like many an anthropologist before her, she is trying to reconcile the world she encounters in her fieldwork with her own perceptions and beliefs. She has just questioned why God manipulating the ova of young girl is any more miraculous than Joseph marrying a pregnant Mary in the strict cultural context of the moment. She is asking why insemination through the Holy Spirit is any more a miracle than the idea that Mary came to her parents after an attack and was met with her father's support. Why do we need the conception to be supernatural? What, she asks, is more miraculous than hope in a moment of despair, of profound healing found in tragedy?

I am a Christian. I believe in God, though I sometimes question him. I believe that Jesus is the son of God, though my mind can't quite comprehend that. Still, I like this woman's argument. I appreciate it. I believe in its message. Because whether Mary was an adolescent virgin or if, as historians would have us believe, she was a young rape victim, there is a deep humanity, vulnerability, fragility in her story, much like the divinely human elements of son's suffering. I think that both conclusions-- rape and virginity-- lead us to hope and to faith and to love.

These are things that I have been thinking about a great deal in the last few days. In what do I place my hope? In what and in whom do I have faith? Who do I love? How I express that? My friend, Julia, recently wrote a beautiful blog entry about love. In it she encourages us to approach our days with more generosity of spirit, with more compassion, with more love towards ourselves and others. I would like to join her in doing that.

It seems to me that living in love necessarily requires living in faith and in hope. Vice versa. No, I am not talking about a Christian faith or divine hope. Rather, I am saying that however we approach them, these are deeply connected concepts. Tonight I would like to rededicate myself to examining my hopes and beliefs and love and living more explicitly in the spaces of interconnection. In this new year, I would like to approach each day with generosity and gratitude, to radiate love. That is my Christmas wish tonight.

much love to you

exhale

*** Tried to post this last night but I had technical problems. Don't I always! ***


This has been a long year. Correction: these have been a long couple of years. Ok, these have been a long several years. Still, 2008 exhausted me. Lately, I was feeling as though things might not get better anytime soon, which, given my eternal optimism, was a fairly awful sensation to experience.

Then at last, today, the return of hope...

My mother received some exciting new offers. Yes, plural. This, combined with Clara's successes, has lifted a huge weight of me. And while we all realize that it is going to take each of us some time to recover from the traumas of this year, the consensus is that we will. That's improvement!

So, I know that 2008 is not officially over for a couple of weeks, but I am going to say farewell tonight. This moment, this is a new beginning. Now as Alison pointed out, change takes time, but a new start just happens. Things haven't changed yet. I know this. There's a lot of healing to do. Change is going to require a dedication and conviction that will undoubtedly test our (non-existent) reserves. It's going to require a whole lot of hard work. Still, I think I am up for it.

Here's looking forward to 2009 and a new world of possibilities.

congratulations clarabelle! (sorry had to)

One of the most extraordinary experiences of this past year has been watching my younger sister grow into this amazingly articulate, determined, wise, and compassionate woman. Life has not always been particularly fair to her and our respective experiences and opportunities have been very different. Yet, despite some rather unfortunate obstacles, she's proven herself to be not only resilient but also rather wonderful.

I've always been aware and somewhat jealous of her wit and loyalty. She's always been a good friend and for better or worse a strong leader. What was rather more of a surprise was discovering how quickly she could rebound from mind-numbing educational institutions, to see just vibrant the thoughts in that head of hers are. Even more than, I've totally floored her discipline. (Especially since I have none of my own. Clearly it isn't genetic.)

Clara has come alive in unexpected and dramatic ways. She expresses herself with a sincerity and confidence that are well beyond her years. She has found passions that are entirely her own and dedicated herself to them without closing herself to possibility. In short, she's proving herself to be this rather incredible woman.

I've been watching this from afar with a particular mix of hope and pride. So last night when she called to tell me that she finished the semester with academic honors, a place in the top echelon of her year, and a perfect GPA, I was ecstatic. These would be great achievements for any young student, but she's done this of her own merit, with little support, and some serious road blocks in her way. I am beyond excited for her.

Congratulations, Clara!

much love

official notice: january 2009

It's official!

I have bought my tickets to the States, booked a car, and accepted the hospitality of my dear friend, Liz, her lovely wife, Lauren, and their rather adorable cats. I'll be teaching a course called New Migrants, New Migrations in the Latin American Studies department at Mount Holyoke during J-term. What does all this mean? It means that I will be in the Pioneer Valley from January 4-24.

I honestly don't think that I could be more excited. (Or terrified, but let's stick with excited.) I'm very much looking forward to teaching in Skinner, sipping Chai tea and eating pumpkin chocolate chip cookies at Rao's in Amherst or in The Dirty, and wandering around Northampton. Basically, I'm thrilled to be returning to my P-valley roots and indulging my fantasy of a perpetual 5-college experience.

More than that I am looking forward to spending time with Liz and Lauren, Roberto, and other dear, dear friends. Since I know that many of you are close by or have your own roots in the area, let me just say, it would be lovely to see you too. (And for all of you New Yorkers, I know that the world seems to begin and end in Manhattan, so rest assured that I'll be making an NYC visit as well! Ok, let me clarify, I'll be making a Brooklyn visit and passing through New York, as we all know my heart is in Brooklyn and not in Manhattan.)

Anyway, if you are Stateside and have my number in the States, give me a call after January 4. If you need my number, send me an email.

much love

faffing about

I should be finishing the final version of the syllabus for the Mount Holyoke course I am teaching in January. I should be writing my lectures for said course. Or writing a chapter of my dissertation. In fact, there are many things I should be doing on this cold winter's night. It's a long, long list, my friends.

What you will not find on that list are the following: jumping around the bedroom pretending to be a rock star whilst singing Buzzcocks songs, alternately reading my favorite NYT Modern Love articles from the last year or passages from You Shall Know Our Velocity, making and eating what feels like 101 crepes, watching Herzog films, or taking an obscenely long bath (think refilling with hot water twice). No, no, none of these things are on that to-do list of mine. Nope, not one. Which of course, means that these are the very things I have spent my Sunday doing.

Now it hasn't been all irresponsible fun and games. I've also managed some Christmas knitting and two very important transatlatic phone calls. Once I finish this post I am going to pull out the good stationary and write one or two long-overdue honest to goodness letters. (I promise to post them! Really!) At some point tonight-- and it will be a long night since my insomnia is back full force-- I will finish off a proposal.

Maybe it's the faffing about or maybe it's the lovely emails and phone calls some of you have sent, perhaps it's the winter air or the thought of far-away friends soon being near again, but whatever it is, I'm feeling particularly hopeful today. I think some very good things are coming this way... or maybe they've already starting revealing themselves. In any case, I'm excited about the new year. Very, very excited.

And now, back to the Buzzcocks...